stupefied

I really am envious of those who gets to go overseas to study. I've lost my chance. Yes, I did have a chance in year 2010, when my dad sprung a surprise call on me. My decision to not going abroad, however, are reasons that i rather keep to myself. Till this day, I'm torn between regret and content.

Nevertheless, I had my share of that miniwealth for my USA trip, of which, I have yet to blog about. All those heavier stuff will come after my exams. For now, I choose to mull over my half-wrong choice with the half-glass-empty attitude and, the regretful part of my being.

I find it hard to speak of my life, because I know its nothing interesting at all. When people ask what I am doing right now, I only have my studies and work to speak about. Unlike those overseas, they have New York, Adeleide, Melbourne, UK, Glasgow, London... etc to narrate about. Even I myself get bored with the things I say. My best attempt to liven things up is to create riduculous identities for myself such as "mahjong queen" and “orchard 小公主" in an desperate attempt to add more dimensions to my stories and self. Now, that is laughable, and not to mention, sympathetic.

I would also attribute my thin and shallow writings to the lack of such experience. Guess books are my only hope now, to open myself up to different genres, cultures, and experiences. But, it's also, vastly different. Of which, I will make up for in quantity.

Just can't wait for the week to be over. Diet plan to materialise. more readings required. grammar books to be completed; balance between work and love, friends and family, mahjong and discipline.

I just wished I can slow down the process of growing up. I don't want to grow up so quick.